#I need a break so badly
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I am so exhausted but at least I managed to pass the exam before Christmas
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im just so tired
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I am attending my second ever library conference next week. The sad thing is the thing I am most excited about it getting a break from my branch. The most ridiculous things have happened in the past 6 months and I am happy to let someone else be in charge for a few days.
#I won’t say what state is it but if you are going to a library conference next week hit me up#julianna talks#I love my job but I am also the most depressed I have been since early 2020#I need a break so badly
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it's one of those mornings where i woke up wishing i hadn't
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Why the CDU/CSU can go fuck itself
Time for another one of these. a quick(ish) summary for all the non-german speakers about why we're freaking out and the state of our democracy.
Spoiler. its not...good. Not catastrophic (yet). But the alarm bells are very, very loud.
Tl;dr: The CDU, party currently prognosed to win the election, has basically worked together with the afd to get a migrationbill to pass that is very strict. The afd are the nazi party that is getting backed by Musk. This might forshadow a cooperation between AFD and CDU. That would put the far right in power. The current response from the general public are demonstrations against that. Like. there are a LOT of protests currently.
Alright grab a drink and lets go.
First, groundwork: Who are parties and who is the guy we currently all want to punch in the face?
on top: Careful, risk of confusion. on the left: on the board of a sleazy cooperation. not interested in the enviroment. Real. On the right: on the board of a sleazy cooperation. not interested in the enviroment. comic figure.
This guy here is Friedrich Merz. no, not the guy on the right. the guy on the left. I know. Easy mistake to make.
He's an asshole. He's also the current boss of the CDU and their chancellor candidate. He's very likely to win according to recent polls.
The CDU has a complicated history, but to simplify it: They were in charge for sixteen years before the now broken apart Traffic-light goverment and are responsible for a lot of shit that we're currently dealing with. Like crumbling infrastructure for example. They were more interested, as a party, to preserve the status quo at all costs, than to invest anything. You could argue that a lot of the enviromental issues we are facing and the reason why Germany is currently pretty stagnant, can be traced back to the one and a half decade the CDU was in charge. They are conservative, not a fan of migration and like to throw around 'tradtional values'.
They are, generally speaking, or better were, center right. More on that later.
The other party that is going to be a major pain in the ass to outright fucking dangerous, is the AFD, short for 'Alternative for Germany'.
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this is Alice Weidel, she's the current chancellor candidate for the afd. here is her wikipedia article and lets just say her 'controversies' part is longer than her 'political positions' part.
Those are the, to put it bluntly, Nazis. They are dangerous but also a fucking mess. Like, to just list a few of their hits: They've been getting money from dictators (different ones btw, not just one), infigthing is a sport to them, they try to glorify the nazi-regime, the german intelligence agency is watching them because they are officially considered radical right-wing and a threat to democracy, there is a petition to ban the afd and that is a high bar to cross, the demonize immigrants, hate queer people, you know, the usual. Also of course political correctness has gone too far and climate change isn't real and we need to leave the EU. Elon Musk, you know the rich guy who did the Nazi-salute, also has been appearing and is actively supporting them. Just in case we were unclear before on where they all stand.
(btw the whole 'elon is supporting them' thing is pretty scary bc you could argue the reason that the afd is able to win so many votes is bc, frankly, they're good at social media. Do i need to elaborate why that is a dangerous combination.)
to put them into perspective: The afd is too right for the other alt-right parties in the EU parlament. There is a coalition in the EU Parlament for the right, made up of all the right wing parties from other nations and the afd is too right for them. So. yeeeeaaah.
that should do it as background information.
Now. back to current events. where both of these parties are getting more and more support.
For a short history of why we currently have a non-functioning goverment, i made a post about that. Be aware that it was made as a product of its time and doesn't have all the information. For example back then we didn't know that FDP had actively engineered that break up and wanted it to happen for a while. Yes. They wanted to topple the goverment they were in. on purpose. It's been a fun time over here in Germany as well.
anyways, lets get to the meat of things. Since we don't have a functional goverment currently, Merz has introduced a harsh migration bill. This has been in the wake of an attack with two murders, where the current suspect is a migrant. while this is a tragedy, its getting brutally misused by all out rightwing parties to scream about how we need stricter migration laws and that migrants are a danger. Which to be so fucking clear about this, is such bullshit. It's been proven so many times how that is bullshit. I'm gonna be real and not even bother. They're just the newest scapegoats everything can be blamed on.
But because nobody has a majority, all attempts at governing so far have been pretty stalled.
(our goverment currently)
Quick information from the past:
in 2018 the CDU basically stated they wouldn't, in any sort of way, cooperate with the AFD, declaring basically a Brandmauer (fire wall). This basically means that yes, the afd had been given seats in the parlament, but nobody would give them any power whatsoever.
This has been the position of the cdu. It is why people still considered them center-right.
Merz has repeatedly said he didn't care who voted with him. now with a slight majority, 348 to 344, the cdu has won, with the support of the afd. Many see this as the fall of the Brandmauer. It's not good. Merz has more and more talking points that sound exactly like the afd and that is SCARY. There is still a vivid memory alive here about why having a far-right goverment is dangerous. There is a reason why there are currently a lot of massive protests all over the country loudly proclaiming that 'never again is now'.
This also puts for many the cdu from 'center right' to 'right'. There are calls from inside the cdu to 'stop demonizing the afd'. This is scary. This could mean that we get not just a conservative goverment in a few weeks, but a rightwing one. One who is comfortable cooperating with radical right wingers if it suits their needs. To cooperate with a party that even our own intelligence agencies consider a threat to our democrazy.
So. that is why your german mutuals sit there like
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Now. To another part. What exactly is that migration bill merz had wanted to pass so desperateldy?
Well first of all it calls for a national emergency, using the beforementioned murder as reasoning, for the danger of immigration. It calls for closing and controls at the borders permanently, not temporary as is curently the case. They want for people without valid ID to be refused entry, even when they are searching safety. People that are already in Germany but need to leave should be thrown in jail until they actually leave.
Which. just to be clear about this. this what the bill they had, that had the support of the afd, says. This is not a wish list. This what they want to be law.
But to be also clear, lots of this is against our current law, against Basic EU law and principle and also a pretty big violation of our constituation.
Which is what makes this situation so fatal. This bill is going to be fought. In court, in politics, with demonstrations on the streets. this bill is controversial. Merz knew that. he knew that a lot of this wouldn't pass. This is a publicly stunt. This is testing the waters. How much will the public allow? how far can he push? Is cooperation with the afd possible for him? How does everyone react?
It was never about immigration or that bill. All the people this is going to impact, all the lives that are going to be lost because of this shit they are pulling - this is to them all just collateral. Its testing how much is possible, tolerated even. The chances of this bill making it law is slim. It needs to pass again in a different body of the goverment with a two thirds majority and that is nowhere in sight.
Also, lets take a look at who voted what:
it was about four votes. So my german friends who also read this - look at this and be aware of who voted what. Who abstained to vote and gave up the four votes it would have taken to stop this. who accepted that to get what they want they would need to get the support of the afd, no matter how much Merz now claims that he still doesn't cooperate with the afd and that there were no talks between them. Look at the numbers. Look how and with who they voted.
To be frank, i am pretty pissed off. I don't think much about wallowing in self-pity and despair. i am pissed off about what is happening. i am pissed off that these people don't have a spine, i am pissed off at the FDP for enabling this in the first place, i am pissed off that we have Nazis in out goverment, i am pissed off that we have people who are willing to cooperate with them. I am pissed off that i need to settle for damage control instead of being able to see something finally move forward.
Now here we come to the less depressing part of this whole thing. And i want you to pay attention to it.
People are protesting. loudly. And in the thousands. There have been ten to a hundred thousands of people all over the country in the last week, protesting against the rise of faschism and the far right. Its all over the country, in different cities. Where the afd appears to talk, so do the protesters. There are 35 afd people to 1300 protesters. People loudly say 'never again is now'. And they show up to back that claim up.
This shit is vile, yes, but it's not going to be unopposed.
I know this all reads as depressing as fuck but do not give into the temptation of falling into despair. This is far from over. Yes those are the alarm bells and they are ringing loudly. But there is still things that can be done. Don't let the afd lure you into thinking this all pointless anyways. It's not. This is all not good, yes, but no reason to fall into blind panic. The bill isn't law yet. Merz is facing massive backlash for his little stunt. This is not a hopeless situation. It's just a shitty one.
#gonna admit at this point i am writing this out for myself to wrap my head around#easier when i am explaining it to other people#german politics#friedrich merz#cdu#fck cdu#fck afd#alice weidel#german stuff#fuck elon#elon musk#merz#its like. two in the morning. i have work tmw. i need to go to bed so badly#germany#maybe tmw ill do a better break down of all the laws this shit is breaking#but i am simply too tired to do that today lol#merz can be lucky if i never meet him#he has a very punchable face is all i am saying#i hope this explains some of the things i post lol
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Good morning, Sleepyhead.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#'WWX was asleep for 4 days' is an incorrect factoid.#The average WWX sleeps for 8 hours. The PD-MDZS WWX who was asleep for 40 comics and 4 months is an outlier.#We are back to present day! I have missed drawing them!#Ah...the contrast between how the flashback ended (cold and distrustful) to how wwx wakes up (warm and watched over)...#The gap between the past and present is very important. Not just in this story but in our lives too.#The past can still hurt and it doesn't just go away with time as some say. It is the power of realizing that things have changed.#We can't get the good back. The bad memories have concluded. Those live somewhere else now.#It is hard to realize that you have to live for today and tomorrow. The past is so loud.#For WWX it is realizing that despite the mistrust in the past - He really does have faith that LWJ will be there for him.#It is the reflection of knowing that you changed and will keep changing and that change is good and kind sometimes.#But more importantly...and this I really do mean with all my heart:#It will all end up okay in the end. Even after the worst day. The most painful losses. You will get through it.#What feels like a breaking point is truthfully just another step you have to take. You'll get through it even though it feels like the end.#There are wonderful things you have yet to see. Friends you have yet to meet.#Even if it hurts so badly...one day it just aches. Someday you'll go a few weeks not remembering that it ever hurt.#Oh and because my izutsumi comic revealed many people were in need of hearing this:#You are loved. Right now. You are so loved right now. We just forget to tell each other that.#Go tell the people you love that they matter to you. I'm assigning you homework!!! You are graded on completion.
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Hey Karl you think whenever BF or GF just hit Pico with a random hug no matter the circumstance his face just crumbles into the most vulnerable and yearning look and suddenly the hug lasts for 20 minutes because they don't have the heart to pull away when Pico lays his arms around their backs in the most gentle way possible
(id in alt - do not repost, please ask before using as icon/ banner etc.)
yeag..
Close-ups of my personal favorite shots LOL. I also really like how Boyf came out here but he's already Huge in the piece so he doesn't need a close-up.
Do you ever think BF and GF get super emotional when he's soft with them? This guy, known for his fuckin' Bite with an attitude developed partially for self-defense, melting at their touch and allowing them to see his more gentle side? Something that nobody else will ever get to see?
The demon and the rapper are nice by default. Boyf can be a bit of a menace and Girlf is not afraid to show her demonic side when necessary, but they're kind to others as a default, maybe even to a fault. Not that Pico doesn't ever show kindness to others, but he's usually prickly and standoffish; his kindness could come off in ways that read almost as passive aggression. And yet, around the two idiots (used affectionately lol) he's like putty in their hands.
Anyways idk what I'm on abt really I just think if you gave him the choice he would literally melt into their embraces. Safe, and protected in their arms; for once, he isn't the one who has to do the protecting. I think the worst part of a hug to him would be having to let go.
#artings#ochre is going to come back and immediately be obliterated by this SORRY.#fnf#friday night funkin#pico#pico newgrounds#girlfriend fnf#friday night funkin girlfriend#boyfriend fnf#friday night funkin boyfriend#rgb trio#pico x girlfriend#picogf#boyfriend x girlfriend x pico#polyship#eyestrain#digital art#comic#be niceys to me i think this is the first finished comic like this ive done. LOL#colors were my enemy here but i like how it turned out in the end i think#if this is received well i might try and do more!! euhhhh no promises tho bc this took me so many fucking hours to get done#so i am not doing another quite yet#decided to focus on picogf for this bc i dont give them nearly enough love i dont think#at least not as much love as i have given picobf so i am going to try and correct that :3c#i just. barely ran out of characters for the alt text on the main image im sorry i am so bad at being brief#<- in a weird mood rn (i need a break from this Badly) but i might come back and edit it later to be more brief
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but when they're out on that river bank alone, what javier should be loyal to doesn't feel as confusing anymore
#also known as 'he wants so badly to run away with his boyfriend and marry him and live happily ever#after'#but his commitment to dutch and the gang breaks his heart#i want them to be happy SO BAAAD SO BAD IM GOINGN TO THROW YP#also the top right one comes w a headcanon#which is that kieran can only bathe if javier is there (and only javier) because otherwise he's too terrified of being k*lled for either bei#ng trans or just in general because he's alone#so that's why he's usually stinky#he really hates being stinky but he doesn't consider it worth dying over#anyway i love them so bad and their little fishing dates#kieran infodumps the whole time and javier feels so lucky to be alive because he knows kieran doesn't talk around anyone else near as much#if at all#javier knows 99% of the fish knowledge but he never interrupts and is always happy to listen to kieran yap about every other topic too#i need to put javi in an 'i ❤️ my autistic boyfriend' shirt#ok i'll shut up now#also i know this composition looks like total shart i'm literally the worst at doing them </3 be nice to me#rdr2#red dead redemption 2#kieran duffy#javier escuella#javieran#am i allowed to say that i own this ship#considering i literally made it LOL i feel so proud even tho it also makes me miserable that i bascially have no one to talk to abt them#image#art#hero draws sometimes
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/627892e98e4bb8fe23a1cd5ea26983fe/f7900d4a331284dc-bf/s540x810/af1b5e74cffafbb3a2601b28d9ad5b10267e3017.jpg)
whaaaaaat
#wip#my art#maybe..#things are not good for them#varigo#varian’s in his first year of college and it’s going badly. don’t major in chem#he’s going to drop out in the middle of the second semester after a psychotic break i think#hugo never even went it just was never a thing that was going to happen. but he would’ve studied engineering so maybe this is for the best#so now they just hang out. varian needs a job and some antipsychotics#hugo needs to cut back on the gooner anime..#but hes got his own place so maybe he can do what he wants#oh well
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skirts suit strider
#homestuck#hom3stuck#home24uck#home2t4ck#dirk strider#lil cal#admin draws#fanart#self harm cw#breaking my mini hiatus to post these week ol dirks#i rly wanted to draw him in a nice long skirt but that ended up not rly being the focus#the one on the left is a product of wanting to draw beach funtimes but i was too emo so it turned into something entirely different#anyhoo. exam tomorrow so im posting this as a bit of a pick-me-up. so i dont die badly without any distractions#i have stuff done im just not posting because. well.#the point of taking a break was to not have notifs to distract me from studying but lol... i think distractions r exactly what#i need after this exam. anxiety thru the roof.#what else... i started redecorating my studying corner. so i can stop doing that in the living room#its been mostly moving shit around + taping up my wall. but im waiting for a print and some frames#so im gonna take a pic and post it when its all done
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question of the day, why is walton goggins so hot?
#i keep watching ghoul edits and DAYUM is that man so fine#why he gotta lick his lips so much like GIVE US A BREAK#i know someone who needs to be kissed badly when I see one#walton goggins#the ghoul#fallout#fallout tv series#fallout show#walton ghoulgins#ghoulcy
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** *** ***** *** ** ***** *** *** *****
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/a0ac4f0a5f04479f054b70470380d9f0/a4698bccdde90ce8-0c/s540x810/1ec7d35dcbde6c86d1128701fa7c3bf2d2db67d9.jpg)
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#cassandra dimitrescu#resident evil#resident evil village#re8#re8 fanart#badly colored#i need her so bad#until the bed breaks
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What if I just started sobbing violently
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#This scene fucking breaks my heart#because it’s one of the four CGs we get where Kaito cries (and even then two of the CGs are more comedic)#and the voice acting makes this scene even more sad#I need to give this man a hug so badly#danganronpa v3#drv3 killing harmony#danganronpa drv3#danganronpa v3 killing harmony#drv3#kaito momota#momota kaito#danganronpa
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friend: hey write caleb smearing blood on mc's face then kissing them or licking it off
me: i need you to give me like 20 seconds not to lie down and scream
It's here btw...
#wonder babbles#i actually am not handling this well at all#i want this boy to be so fucked up you don't understand#lies down i want him to hold mc's hand and almost crack the bones#i want all of his affection so tinged with violence#i need it SO badly#god i thought i was finally not frothing at the mouth for a villain but no#i'm back in the fucking building again#i cannot escape#i am never leaving#i will always find the worst men and heart eye at them#sylus was a BREAK from usual programming#i want that metal hand around mc's throat as he steals their breathe in 2 ways#i want it to creak with the force#I;'M GOOD I'M FINE NO ONE TOUCH ME#i am actually so not ok with the descent into madness#hduyhdsuhadu this is NOT SITTING WELL WITH ME#i ASKED FOR IT AND NOW I CAN'T HANDLE IT
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actually so crazy when you think about it like. random scientists came to her saying “hey we think your entire family was raptured because of the location they were in” and she’s like “i was in the kitchen with them” and the scientists are like “well you were at the sink! they were at the table!” oh ok. we’re getting departed based off our longitude and latitude now. okay.
so where is she meant to feel safe in the world. because it’s not like “departure hot spots” were identified BEFORE. the idea that these hot spots exists only comes afterwards. so where are you meant to feel safe. well maybe if it happens again the same “hot spots” will be relevant. so you have to go somewhere without any “hot spots”. a place where the location guarantees your safety.
except you get there and the next night three girls disappear. and you keep telling everyone it wasn’t a second departure (because the idea that the sudden departure could happen again terrifies you. but the idea that it could happen again at any moment is also motivating every choice you make.) and no one’s listening. and then scientists start talking about a new theory. what if the departure wasn’t location based. what if certain people acted as lenses magnifying the likeness of someone departing?
what if your entire family got taken from you so you ran away hoping to feel safe and now people are hypothesizing that the common variable causing these departures is you :) you’re the danger!! :)
#like it’s actually SOOOO CRAZY THAT THEY SHOWED UP TO HER HOUSE AND WERE LIKE ‘it’s you!!!’#what if you wanted to feel safe but the danger is you. would that be fucked up or what.#guys they made television.#nora durst you are stronger than me. i would have just ****** ****** NOT HATING.#guy who got home intended to do things and is now just thinking about the leftovers#LIKE NORA HAS A FLIGHT RESPONSE YES. BUT WHERE IS SHE SUPPOSED TO FLEE.#wait guys it gets worse. what if after all this. your adopted child’s birth mom asks for her back#LMAOOOOOOO SHE LITERALLY COULDNT HAVE SHIT. ITS ACTUALLY SO CRAZY TO THINK ABOUT#LIKE I TOO WOULD GET A TATTOO OF MY KIDS NAMES GET EMBARRASSED GET THE WU TANG CLAN SYMBOL TO COVER IT UP#GET EMBARRASSED ABOUT THAT AND BREAK MY ARM SO I GET A CAST AND CAN HIDE IT.#no like the actually crazy part is that in the end she literally went to the promised land the place she wanted so badly to reach.#and she was a ghost there.#ok i need to stop.#the people yearn for nora durst. i’m people#the leftovers#nora durst
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Neeeeeed a malevolent g/t fic, either with John getting his own eldritch body while they're in the dreamlands or after they leave with him projecting one out. I'm talking Arthur's smaller than one of his fingers.
Something happens, Arthur wakes up, either on the ground or already in John's hand. Can't decide which. And he's blind! So he can't tell what's going on at first. But then something shifts above or below him and he gets concerned, John's been awfully quiet.
He's getting worried, calling out. And then if he's on John's hand?(Eldritch entity, that thing is going to be only vaguely handish) he's getting too close to the edge, or if he's on the ground he's getting too close to John's tentacles/feet. Either way John calls out for him to stop, and it's deafening.
It's always felt like John was talking directly into his skull, and this feels like that too with the way it rolls through him, but in away that reminds him more of the king in yellow. Both in his head and a physical rolling presence that vibrates his bones.
Arthur is understandably, freaked. He thinks it's the king, that John's been taken and he's being toyed with. Takes some arguing for Arthur to believe its John, and then he gets frustrated that John won't tell him what's wrong or what's going on. In their argument John gets frustrated and either grabs Arthur from the ground or closes his fist around him depending on the starting position.
It's terrifying.
He is enfolded, enclosed, in something massive and shifting, and he can't make sense of where he is in space other than that he's moving, or is that just the thing shifting around him? He feels claustrophobic. He can't breathe. He can't breathe the space is moving and it's closing in on him.
Meanwhile John is momentarily pleased that he's gotten Arthur to shut up, before jumping to concerned because Arthur's brain is sending out a lot of very concerning panic/crumbling into madness symbols, and he can hear him hyperventilating.
He unfolds his grip, and Arthur's just trembling there for a good while. John attempts to soothe him with his voice, starts describing their surroundings. Maybe even begins petting him a bit?
Arthur eventually calms down, and they talk a bit about what happened. John still dances around it a bit because he doesn't want to make Arthur scared/angry, but since he's already fucked that up he decides to come clean.
Arthur's a bit hesitant/defensive at first. This is a major shift in their physical power dynamic after all, and he hasn't forgotten what being grabbed felt like.
"Describe yourself to me."
"...ok"
#my post#little bit of an idea/drabble for y'all lol#god i need someone to write this so badly#mostly because i dont think i have a good enough hold on their personalities to do this justice#my favorite part of g/t has always been the fear of being around something that much larger and physically powerful than yourself#and by god do i want arthur to experience it#especially since hes blind#so the freakout level of omg what the fuck just touched me its huge is increased#love putting this man in situations#plus side for john being that arthur is now pocket sized and much more easily protectable#and kind of cute lets be honest#little angry dog snapping at your fingers and spitting vitriol at you#but he cant even really break the skin#g/t#fearplay#malevolent#arthur lester#john doe#john malevolent
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